But why do I feel so guilty?
I don't understand it! I used to die to have a boyfriend; feel like the world was ending if I was alone. But now I am "alone" and I love it...
....so why do I feel so backwards?
Am I feeling guilt for not wanting a guy? That's ridiculous, right? I don't need a guy, but more importantly, I don't need to WANT a guy, for my life to be whole. So many books, magazines and hoity-toity Hollywood trash are designed to make us feel like we need someone, so we'll spend money on looking good, going on dates, and condoms. Low self-esteem = money in the beauty stores pockets. We buy magazines on how to make men wants us and we blow huge wads of cash every Friday and Saturday prowling the bar/club/pub/whatever circuit, thinking Mr. Right - or at least Mr. Right-Now - is going to be there. But WHY?! Why should I have to be made to feel like I need to put in all this effort, with little to no reward, just because I don't have a man to solidify my self worth?
No. I'm free from that. I finally broke free from a man who made me feel like I was the most disgusting thing in the world and I'm done with all that! I don't NEED someone to make me feel beautiful - I have my mirror. I don't NEED someone to have a good time on a Friday night - I have my friends and family. Hell, I don't even need a man for the big O - I got my...well, you know!
The only thing I'd need a man for right now is to have kids. But I'm not trying to pop out no babies right here, so I'm good for at least 3 - 7 years.
So am I saying I'm giving up on men? NO! Not at all! I'm just saying I don't NEED a man. I'm fine and I don't want to feel bad about that. I like being able to take care of myself and go where I want to go, when I want to go.
No, the next time I fall in love, I will not NEED this man, I will enjoy his company and he will simply be my best friend. And I am so happy about this decision.
On a similar note, I don't think I would ever date another woman. I did, once, and she was special, and I never want to mar that memory by trying to force someone else to be as special to me as she was/is. I just hope she knows without me seeming creepy.
So...yeah. Sorry this got a little anticlimactic, I just needed to get that out there. Thanks for reading...or not. That's your call.
Have fun, children,
Hearts,
Joanna
....so why do I feel so backwards?
Am I feeling guilt for not wanting a guy? That's ridiculous, right? I don't need a guy, but more importantly, I don't need to WANT a guy, for my life to be whole. So many books, magazines and hoity-toity Hollywood trash are designed to make us feel like we need someone, so we'll spend money on looking good, going on dates, and condoms. Low self-esteem = money in the beauty stores pockets. We buy magazines on how to make men wants us and we blow huge wads of cash every Friday and Saturday prowling the bar/club/pub/whatever circuit, thinking Mr. Right - or at least Mr. Right-Now - is going to be there. But WHY?! Why should I have to be made to feel like I need to put in all this effort, with little to no reward, just because I don't have a man to solidify my self worth?
No. I'm free from that. I finally broke free from a man who made me feel like I was the most disgusting thing in the world and I'm done with all that! I don't NEED someone to make me feel beautiful - I have my mirror. I don't NEED someone to have a good time on a Friday night - I have my friends and family. Hell, I don't even need a man for the big O - I got my...well, you know!
The only thing I'd need a man for right now is to have kids. But I'm not trying to pop out no babies right here, so I'm good for at least 3 - 7 years.
So am I saying I'm giving up on men? NO! Not at all! I'm just saying I don't NEED a man. I'm fine and I don't want to feel bad about that. I like being able to take care of myself and go where I want to go, when I want to go.
No, the next time I fall in love, I will not NEED this man, I will enjoy his company and he will simply be my best friend. And I am so happy about this decision.
On a similar note, I don't think I would ever date another woman. I did, once, and she was special, and I never want to mar that memory by trying to force someone else to be as special to me as she was/is. I just hope she knows without me seeming creepy.
So...yeah. Sorry this got a little anticlimactic, I just needed to get that out there. Thanks for reading...or not. That's your call.
Have fun, children,
Hearts,
Joanna
posted by Meg @ 8:07 AM
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